Jan 072005

not that he needs it…

Recently someone linked from Erik’s blog over to Re:Becca and left a message stating his feelings about her blog. First, Erik had nothing to do with that. Second, Becca said NOTHING rude about Erik. Third, I am not trying to start another flame war of any kind!! What I want to say are my feelings, and also I want to clarify some things.

Although Becca said nothing rude, in fact she left up a very nice link to his site, she left the insinuation that Erik allows MS to “define” him because he blogs about this exclusively. Erik blogs about MS, because he wanted to give back to the online community in an area that he was rapidly acquiring knowledge. He wanted to put an experience log out there for someone who was newly diagnosed to be able to look at and read. Everything seemed so overwhelming to both of us at first, that he wanted a chance for others, friends, and family to see that everything would be okay. It is also a way of discussing MS, without it being a part of every conversation he has with those who care the most about him. I think that anyone reading this can appreciate his (and my) feelings on this.

I want it noted to all of you who read this site, that Erik is a wonderful husband. I don’t know how he ever ended up with me as his wife, because he deserves someone so much better. He is the most incredible father. Our children light up when he comes home, and he puts so much of himself into our kids. He loves his parents, his sister, Aunts, all his family and my family and would do anything for them. He is a faithful Christian and a loving person. I am so proud to be his wife.

My whole point is that MS does not define him or rule his life. Besides the blog, and spending time with us, he works full time, and goes to school full time. As I write this he is working with our son teaching him the alphabet.

Okay, so maybe I digress and I brag a little, but he would never do it. 🙂

So, if you are out there and reading this blog, please don’t think that MS has to define who you are, or that it is all that you think about. Erik is blogging about his experiences and knowledge, but MS does not define who you are or where you are going. So, take your medication, if you can, and live your life. Because life is way to short for MS to be the only focus.


Eriksgirl aka Brandy

  6 Responses to “Coming to Erik’s Defense”

  1. Brandy: Stand by your maaaannnn … 🙂
    I found that after a few years, the whole MS novelty wore off. I dont think about it quite so much anymore unless I am having a rough day. Kids help, so do inspirations like my Mother. MS since 1976 and she can still paddle my ass is she deems it necessary.

  2. I didn’t know you yankee boys listened to quality country music! 😉

    Sounds like you were raised by a neat set of parents, based on things you have said in your blog about them. Personally it also sounds like you may still need a paddling every now and again… glad there is someone in your life on top of that! 🙂

    Take Care Man!

  3. A little old but here is what I posted a while back: Why I Blog My MS Experience.

    My wife is being too generous about me, but I certainly appreciate it. 😉

  4. I haven’t read any other posts except this one, but I have to say even if Erik talks about, writes about, thinks about, etc. MS, it’s no wonder. It is a part of who he is. It does, at times, dictate how he has to live.

    My mom was diagnosed with chronic progressive MS in 1997. I lived with her and my dad to help with anything that she needed. During the two years I lived with them, I saw how the MS came to partly define who my mom is. There’s just no escaping being defined, to a degree, by the illness. It’s part of who she is now, just as she is defined by many other things: mother, friend, writer, etc.

    If writing about the MS helps Erik, that’s what is important.

  5. Anon,

    Semantically I am going to disagree with you. MS does not define Erik, but it is a part of what he has to deal with each day. I would say it helps shape the person he is, but when you say define, that is much more personal. Really, I think we are both saying the same thing.

    My hope is that VERY soon there will be a cure. By that I mean a complete arresting of the MS and a way to go back and cure damage. Then it won’t be a part of either Erik’s or your Mom’s life anymore!

    Take Care, and we will pray for your Mom.


  6. I dont pop in here as much as i should but i know you have a very loving wife and family i only hope i am as lucky as you!
    good health to you all!

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